Finance

How to navigate financial conversations with your partner as newlyweds

Published

7 months ago

April 8, 2024

FOX Business’ Lauren Simonetti took to the streets of New York City to get people’s take on the recent Bankrate survey that revealed 40% of Americans who are married or living with a partner commit ‘financial infidelity.’

After the wedding and honeymoon bliss wears off, it’s time to get back to reality.

Money is a topic that requires discussion between you and your partner, hopefully before nuptials take place. Finances can be a huge point of contention between couples, so it’s important to establish a plan early on about how you both, as a married couple, are going to deal with money.

Money is also often an awkward topic between partners, but it’s vital to be honest with each other through financial conversations. After all, 44% of couples argue at least occasionally about money, according to Bankrate.

Below are tips to follow as newlyweds to help you navigate through the sticky situation of finances.

Discussing finances is a difficult, but important conversation to have with your spouse. ( / iStock)

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Put the discussion of money out there
Determine your long-term and short-term financial goals
Figure out how you are going to save as a couple
Create a budget
Adjust finances when necessary

1. Put the discussion of money out there

When you sit down with your partner to talk about finances, put it all out there. Be 100% honest with each other, so there aren’t any surprises down the line.

One important topic is debt. This includes everything from personal loans, credit card debt and student loans. Figure out how much you both have and come up with a plan on how you will pay it off.

Also, talk about your spending and saving habits. What do you spend a lot of money on? Do you consider yourself a spender or a saver? How much money have you already saved? Do you have a retirement plan in place?

2. Determine your long-term and short-term financial goals

Establish the goals that you have together, short- and long-term.

If you have outstanding debt, one goal is probably going to be to get that paid off as soon as possible. Maybe you want to save for a down payment for a house. Do you have an emergency fund set up yet? If not, maybe one of your first goals is to get that funded.

You can also talk about short-term money goals. This includes things like saving for a vacation or maybe a new vehicle.

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When talking about finances with your spouse, be open and transparent about things like debt and your own personal spending habits. ( / iStock)

3. Figure out how you are going to save as a couple

There are three different ways you can handle finances together. The first is doing everything jointly. The second is keeping your finances completely separate and the third is a combination of both.

Today, 43% of U.S. couples who are married, in a civil partnership or live together have only joint accounts, according to Bankrate.

Thirty-four percent of couples have a mix of joint and separate accounts, according to the source, and 23% have completely separate accounts.

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The stats do show that keeping money separate as a couple is an idea posed by younger generations, with 69% of millennials keeping separate accounts, according to Bankrate.

How you and your spouse plan to handle your finances is a personal decision. Some, like Dave Ramsey, for example, believe that when a couple is married, their money should get married too, and all income should go into the same pot.

Others would rather keep things separate, although this does pose difficulty when bills and children come into play.

Certain couples find value in a combination of both ideas.

For most couples, individuals won’t have the same debts and income, which can quickly create financial imbalance and hostility towards one another.

That is why it’s so important to talk through all of these options with your partner, and determine what is best for you during the stage of your life that you’re in. Remember, you aren’t stuck to one way of doing things forever. If the method you choose isn’t working, you can always change things.

That said, lumping everything together still remains the most popular option.

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4. Create a budget

Creating a budget is a great way to keep you on track with your goals and see spending habits clearly.

Whether you’ve made a budget before or not, creating one with your partner for the first time is a new experience. Even if you’ve made one as a single individual for years, it’s going to look different now that you’re married.

When creating a budget, key things to consider are your combined income, expenses and saving plans.

Revisit your budget monthly to make sure you are on track with your goals and to make any necessary adjustments. ( / iStock)

Once you know your combined income, list out all of your expenses, including bills as well as debts that you need to pay.

Then, don’t forget to also include how much you want to save from month to month. A popular budgeting method for couples and individuals is the 50/30/20 rule, where 50% of money goes toward needs, 30% toward wants and 20% to savings.

5. Adjust finances when necessary

An initial money conversation is great, but it should not be the only one you have. Check in with each other on a monthly or bimonthly basis to ensure changes are made and points are heard.

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Make any adjustments you need to make in order to maintain a healthy relationship with your significant other and your finances.