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What author Stephanie Kiser learned as a nanny for the ultra-rich

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Stefanie Kiser Book: “Wanted: Toddler’s Personal Assistant”. Cover design by Jillian Rahn/Sourcebooks.

Courtesy: Stefanie Kiser

Stephanie Kiser came to New York City in 2014 as a new college graduate, hoping to become a screenwriter. Instead, she spent the next seven years as a nanny for wealthy families.

Kiser’s new memoir, “Wanted: Toddler’s Personal Assistant: How Nannying for the 1% Taught Me about the Myths of Equality, Motherhood, and Upward Mobility in America,” details her unexpected career detour.

Her seven years as a nanny saw her escorting one client’s daughter to $500-per-lesson literacy tutors on the Upper East Side, driving Porsches and Mercedes for everyday errands and sheltering in place at a family’s home in the Hamptons during the Covid-19 pandemic. Her clients included families with dynastic wealth as well as those with high-paying jobs such as doctors and lawyers.

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In Kiser’s first nannying job, she was paid $20 an hour, far more than the $14 an hour she estimates she would have made as a production assistant under a short-term contract. Plus, she often ended up working extra hours.

“It usually ended up being like $1,000 a week with everything that I was doing,” Kiser said.

That first job opened doors for higher-paid positions through nanny agencies. In Kiser’s final year as a nanny during the pandemic, she estimates she took home about $110,000.

“Even though I had the least respected job of my friends, I definitely was making the most,” said Kiser, who is now 32 and works at an ad-tech company in New York City.

CNBC spoke with Kiser about some of the financial lessons she learned during her time as a nanny, and why she ultimately left the role.

(This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity). 

No prospects for job growth: ‘I was very stationary’

Scarlett Johansson on Location for “The Nanny Diaries” on May 1, 2006 at Upper East Side in New York City, New York, United States.

James Devaney | Wireimage | Getty Images

Ana Teresa Solá: When I first saw this book, I thought of “The Nanny Diaries,” a novel published in the early 2000s and then adapted into a movie. What made you decide to turn your story into a memoir instead of a novel? 

Stephanie Kiser: I read “The Nanny Diaries” when I started my first job. It definitely hit home at the time, but I did feel like it was sort of a satire. I didn’t want to villainize the rich or the poor because I have people I love very dearly on both sides. 

The intention of my book was to make a social commentary. It was my hope that I could bridge this understanding a bit between the two sides because there’s this thought that poor people just aren’t working hard enough and rich people are just inherently bad. 

I don’t think that’s necessarily true, but I think that people who are wealthy, who are employing these people who really need these jobs, they do have privilege and an opportunity to either make someone’s life better or worse.

A contract as a nanny is important because there’s no HR.

ATS: You mention that you could not afford to work in a professional job in New York because the pay was much lower than you were making as a nanny. Did you feel trapped?

SK: When my last boss read this book, she felt sad and was like, ‘I didn’t realize you were so miserable doing the job.’ I said, ‘No, I wasn’t miserable doing the job. I loved your kids so much, but this was not the job I wanted.’

I did feel trapped. I felt like there’s nothing else I could possibly do, and it got a little bit worse as time went on.

All my friends were growing in these jobs and they were getting more experience in their resume, and I wasn’t. I was very stationary in this position.

It wasn’t a good feeling to feel like there’s nothing else I could possibly do. Now I have a different job and this is the first year that I’m earning more than I did nannying, which is great, but the first couple of years after nannying were definitely really hard financially, making that shift.

‘There’s no HR … the contract is really all you have’

ATS: A family offered you a salary of $125,000, plus full health and dental, a monthly metro card and an annual bonus. But you went with a different family for less pay. You mentioned you were waiting on a contract. Why is that so important in the business?

SK: A contract as a nanny is important because there’s no human resources; there’s no laws protecting you. Your employers are fully in charge of everything and they determine everything. [New York State does have a “Domestic Workers Bill of Rights” with a few protections.]

At a regular job, you can be like, ‘I worked 60 hours already this week, and I’m not going to work more.’ You can’t do that here [with a nanny position.]

The contract is really all you have, and to not get the contract was really worrisome. Your whole life was going to be a nanny for this family. And I was coming off of a job where that had been really tricky, feeling like I wasn’t really a person, and I didn’t want to accept a job where that was the case again. 

Stefanie Kiser Book: “Wanted: Toddler’s Personal Assistant”. Cover design by Jillian Rahn/Sourcebooks.

Courtesy: Stefanie Kiser

ATS: Can you describe the differences between an au pair and a nanny?

SK: An au pair is allowed to work a certain number of hours, like up to 30 hours a week or 40 hours a week, but there is a clear boundary because they often work for an agency. The agency that has sent them has told you very clearly they cannot work more than this.

They get a very small stipend, but they do get specific accommodations, maybe they have their own room. They have all their meals paid for, transportation. An au pair has more things in place to make sure that they’re not taken advantage of. Nannies often don’t have these protections.

Nannies who come from agencies are slightly more protected and those are typically the ones who get contracts. But these are the best of the best nannies; these are career nannies who have been doing this for 50 years; they’ve raised so many kids and they have amazing references. Or it’s a young nanny that just got here after graduating from a great university and has like 10 skills that they are able to offer. So this is a luxury, honestly.

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ATS: You also describe the uncertainty associated with this job. It seems like nannying work can have a low barrier to entry, with salary growth potential, but then there are all these other risks.

SK: I’ve known nannies who’ve gotten pregnant and they tell their boss. There’s no, ‘We’re going to pay you three months maternity.’ there’s no, ‘We’re gonna let you leave on month eight so you can rest.’ There’s none of that.

You can never really feel safe in the job. If you have a medical emergency, if anything goes wrong — I’m sure there’s exceptions, but for the most part, you’re sort of just out of luck. It is a really risky career in that sense. 

‘That’s how you know they’re wealthy’

ATS: According to the Pew Research Center, about 47% of childless adults under 50 in 2023 said they are unlikely to ever have children. What would that mean for nannies?

SK: I wonder if that applies to the sort of people that I’m writing about. I wonder if for them this is a decline we’ll see or if they’re sort of outliers.

If it is the case, I think it’s a really serious problem. There are a lot of people in New York who come here and they need something to get by, who babysit, maybe it’s their after work job and that’s how they do it. Or there’s people who don’t have papers that are really limited in what they can do, and a lot of times, housekeeping and nannying is the only option.

ATS:  At the end of the book, you write that you received an offer as a personal assistant for a CEO with a $90,000 salary and benefits. Was that starting point below what you had been earning as a nanny at the time?

SK: For sure. As a nanny, I had made $110,000 … So it was a significant decrease.

I had to work very quickly and very hard to get promoted. I was a personal assistant and I was an executive assistant, I changed companies last July and I became a senior assistant, and that was the role where I finally made more than I did nannying. And I don’t think I could have done this, made this transition, if my student loan payments weren’t paused because of Covid.

ATS: You write in your book that some families signal their wealth by having many children. I’m curious to hear more about that.

SK: I think about where I was born and where I came from, and anytime there was a family that had like five or six kids, it was sort of like, ‘Well that makes sense, because they weren’t wealthy.’ And then you come to New York and you see someone on Park Avenue that has five or six kids, and it’s like, ‘That’s how you know they’re wealthy.’

Here, if you do have three kids, you start sending them to preschool at $40,000 a year, and then they’re going to these elite schools from kindergarten to 12th grade that are $60,000 a year, and then you’re sending them to Harvard for four years.

And it’s not even just the schooling, it’s most of the time you’re sending three kids to this school, then you’re employing a full-time nanny after they have private guitar lessons.

ATS: What would you tell women in their 20s who are in the shoes you were in a few years ago? 

SK: Do things in parallel. I don’t think I would have been happy if I had done just the nannying. I couldn’t have survived on just writing, but I think that by doing this in parallel, things turned out exactly how they were supposed to be for me.

Nannying was so important for me because not only was I able to make money to live, but it allowed me to get a foundation. When I moved to New York, I had nothing. Now I have a fully furnished apartment, things that you need to be a fully functioning adult. I have a dog, I’m able to take care of him and I have a car. These are things that I couldn’t have done without being a nanny.

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Forgotten 401(k) fees cost workers thousands in retirement savings

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No access to a 401(k)?

With more Americans job hopping in the wake of the Great Resignation, the risk of “forgetting” a 401(k) plan with a previous employer has jumped, recent studies show. 

As of 2023, there were 29.2 million left-behind 401(k) accounts holding roughly $1.65 trillion in assets, up 20% from two years earlier, according to the latest data by Capitalize, a fintech firm.

Nearly half of employees leave money in their old plans during work transitions, according to a 2024 report from Vanguard.

However, that can come at a cost.

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For starters, 41% of workers are unaware that they are paying 401(k) fees at all, a 2021 survey by the U.S. Government Accountability Office found.

In most cases, 401(k) fees, which can include administrative service costs and fees for investment management, are relatively low, depending on the plan provider. 

But there could be additional fees on 401(k) accounts left behind from previous jobs that come with an extra bite.

Fees on forgotten 401(k)s

Jelena Danilovic | Getty Images

Former employees who don’t take their 401(k) with them could be charged an additional fee to maintain those accounts, according to Romi Savova, CEO of PensionBee, an online retirement provider. “If you leave it with the employer, the employer could force the record keeping costs on to you,” she said.

According to PensionBee’s analysis, a $4.55 monthly nonemployee maintenance fee on top of other costs can add up to nearly $18,000 in lost retirement funds over time. Not only does the monthly fee eat into the principal, but workers also lose the compound growth that would have accumulated on the balance, the study found.

Fees on those forgotten 401(k)s can be particularly devastating for long-term savers, said Gil Baumgarten, founder and CEO of Segment Wealth Management in Houston.

That doesn’t necessarily mean it pays to move your balance, he said.

“There are two sides to every story,” he said. “Lost 401(k)s can be problematic, but rolling into a IRA could come with other costs.”

What to do with your old 401(k)

When workers switch jobs, they may be able to move the funds to a new employer-sponsored plan or roll their old 401(k) funds into an individual retirement account, which many people do.

But IRAs typically have higher investment fees than 401(k)s and those rollovers can also cost workers thousands of dollars over decades, according to another study, by The Pew Charitable Trusts, a nonprofit research organization.

Collectively, workers who roll money into IRAs could pay $45.5 billion in extra fees over a hypothetical retirement period of 25 years, Pew estimated.

Another option is to cash out an old 401(k), which is generally considered the least desirable option because of the hefty tax penalty. Even so, Vanguard found 33% of workers do that.

How to find a forgotten 401(k) 

While leaving your retirement savings in your former employer’s plan is often the simplest option, the risk of losing track of an old plan has been growing.

Now, 25% of all 401(k) plan assets are left behind or forgotten, according to the most recent data from Capitalize, up from 20% two years prior.

However, thanks to “Secure 2.0,” a slew of measures affecting retirement savers, the Department of Labor created the retirement savings lost and found database to help workers find old retirement plans.

“Ultimately, it can’t really be lost,” Baumgarten said. “Every one of these companies has a responsibility to provide statements.” Often simply updating your contact information can help reconnect you with these records, he advised.   

You can also use your Social Security number to track down funds through the National Registry of Unclaimed Retirement Benefits, a private-sector database.

In 2022, a group of large 401(k) plan administrators launched the Portability Services Network.

That consortium works with defined contributor plan rollover specialist Retirement Clearinghouse on auto portability, or the automatic transfer of small-balance 401(k)s. Depending on the plan, employees with up to $7,000 could have their savings automatically transferred into a workplace retirement account with their new employer when they change jobs.

The goal is to consolidate and maintain those retirement savings accounts, rather than cashing them out or risk losing track of them, during employment transitions, according to Mike Shamrell, vice president of thought leadership at Fidelity Investments, the nation’s largest provider of 401(k) plans and a member of the Portability Services Network.

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‘What’s the point’ of saving money

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Xavier Lorenzo | Moment | Getty Images

Gen Z seems to have a case of economic malaise.

Nearly half (49%) of its adult members — the oldest of whom are in their late 20s — say planning for the future feels “pointless,” according to a recent Credit Karma poll.

A freewheeling attitude toward summer spending has taken root among young adults who feel financial “despair” and “hopelessness,” said Courtney Alev, a consumer financial advocate at Credit Karma.

They think, “What’s the point when it comes to saving for the future?” Alev said.

That “YOLO mindset” among Generation Z — the cohort born from roughly 1997 through 2012 — can be dangerous: If unchecked, it might lead young adults to rack up high-interest debt they can’t easily repay, perhaps leading to delayed milestones like moving out of their parents’ home or saving for retirement, Alev said.

But your late teens and early 20s is arguably the best time for young people to develop healthy financial habits: Starting to invest now, even a little bit, will yield ample benefits via decades of compound interest, experts said.

“There are a lot of financial implications in the long term if these young people aren’t planning for their financial future and [are] spending willy-nilly however they want,” Alev said.

Why Gen Z feels disillusioned

That said, that many feel disillusioned is understandable in the current environment, experts said.

The labor market has been tough lately for new entrants and those looking to switch jobs, experts said.

The U.S. unemployment rate is relatively low, at 4.2%. However, it’s much higher for Americans 22 to 27 years old: 5.8% for recent college grads and 6.9% for those without a bachelor’s degree, according to Federal Reserve Bank of New York data as of March 2025.

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Young adults are also saddled with debt concerns, experts said.

“They feel they don’t have any money and many of them are in debt,” said Winnie Sun, co-founder and managing director of Sun Group Wealth Partners, based in Irvine, California. “And they’re wondering if the degree they have (or are working toward) will be of value if A.I. takes all their jobs anyway. So is it just pointless?”

About 50% of bachelor’s degree recipients in the 2022-23 class graduated with student debt, with an average debt of $29,300, according to College Board.

The federal government restarted collections on student debt in default in May, after a five-year pause.

The Biden administration’s efforts to forgive large swaths of student debt, including plans to help reduce monthly payments for struggling borrowers, were largely stymied in court.

“Some hoped some or more of it would be forgiven, and that didn’t turn out to be the case,” said Sun, a member of CNBC’s Financial Advisor Council.

Meanwhile, in a 2024 report, the New York Fed found credit card delinquency rates were rising faster for Gen Z than for other generations. About 15% had maxed out their cards, more than other cohorts, it said.

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It’s also “never been easier to buy things,” with the rise of buy now, pay later lending, for example, Alev said.

BNPL has pushed the majority of Gen Z users — 77% — to say the service has encouraged them to spend more than they can afford, according to the Credit Karma survey. The firm polled 1,015 adults ages 18 and older, 182 of whom are from Gen Z.

These financial challenges compound an environment of general political and financial uncertainty, amid on-again-off-again tariff policy and its potential impact on inflation and the U.S. economy, for example, experts said.

“You start stacking all these things on top of each other and it can create a lack of optimism for young people looking to get started in their financial lives,” Alev said.

How to manage that financial malaise

Patricio Nahuelhual | Moment | Getty Images

“This is actually the most exciting time to invest, because you’re young,” Sun said.

Instituting mindful spending habits, such as putting a waiting period of at least 24 hours in place before buying a non-essential item, can help prevent unnecessary spending, she added.

Sun advocates for paying down high-interest debt before focusing on investing, so interest payments don’t quickly spiral out of control. Or, as an alternative, they can try to fund a 401(k) to get their full company match while also working to pay off high-interest debt, she said.

“Instead of getting into the ‘woe is me’ mode, change that into taking action,” Sun said. “Make a plan, take baby steps and get excited about opportunities to invest.”

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Trump admin seeks Education Department layoff ban lifted

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A demonstrator speaks through a megaphone during a Defend Our Schools rally to protest U.S. President Donald Trump’s executive order to shut down the U.S. Department of Education, outside its building in Washington, D.C., U.S., March 21, 2025.

Kent Nishimura | Reuters

The Trump administration on Friday asked the Supreme Court to lift a court order to reinstate U.S. Department of Education employees the administration had terminated as part of its efforts to dismantle the agency.

Officials for the administration are arguing to the high court that U.S. District Judge Myong Joun in Boston didn’t have the authority to require the Education Department to rehire the workers. More than 1,300 employees were affected by the mass layoffs.

The staff reduction “effectuates the Administration’s policy of streamlining the Department and eliminating discretionary functions that, in the Administration’s view, are better left to the States,” Solicitor General D. John Sauer wrote in the filing.

A federal appeals court had refused on Wednesday to lift the judge’s ruling.

In his May 22 preliminary injunction, Joun pointed out that the staff cuts led to the closure of seven out of 12 offices tasked with the enforcement of civil rights, including protecting students from discrimination on the basis of race and disability.

Meanwhile, the entire team that supervises the Free Application for Federal Student Aid, or FAFSA, was also eliminated, the judge said. (Around 17 million families apply for college aid each year using the form, according to higher education expert Mark Kantrowitz.)

The Education Dept. announced its reduction in force on March 11 that would have gutted the agency’s staff.

Two days later, 21 states — including Michigan, Nevada and New York — filed a lawsuit against the Trump administration for its staff cuts at the agency.

After President Donald Trump signed an executive order on March 20 aimed at dismantling the Education Department, more parties sued to save the department, including the American Federation of Teachers.

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